/brit/

Just found out 'Draining the Oceans' is a joint United Kingdom - Australian production
very cool

wife just yelled at me for farting on her foot

NOOOOO I DON'T WANT TO GO NOT ANOTHER DAY OF SUPERMARKET TOIL

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aye

50 cent just posted this pic on Instagram

Impressive desu

hello member of the 50 cent fan club

excuse me mate wheres the toilet roll??

can you go check out the back??

what about hand sanitisier??

can you go check if you have cheese and onion walkers out the back? theres none on the shelves mate

When are you next getting hand sanitiser in?

what do you do there?

>be USA
>China's economy is growing at remarkable pace, will overtake the US soon
>must find a way to destabilize China before they become too powerful
>launch trade war, fails miserably. China GDP still grows 6%
>fund Hong Kong protests for months, try to provoke Tiananmen 2.0 to justify global sanctions against China
>CCP doesn't take the bait
>dumb HKers set old people on fire, movement loses international support
>fuck, have no choice
>unleash bio weapon in Wuhan during the 2019 Military World Games
>virus is incredibly infectious, 2 week incubation period, asymptomatic spread, basically impossible to contain
>takes weeks to kill, will silently infect tens of thousands in Wuhan before CNY where everyone will travel to every corner of China
>China will fail to contain virus, economy will collapse, international community will shun China and will impose decades of economic sanctions
>virus will burn through elderly population in US, solving the funding problems with social security and medicaid saving US government trillions
>USA remains world power for next century
>BUT
>China somehow discovers the virus in 1 chang in a city of 11 million, far earlier than expected, sequences genome 5 days later
>China immediately realizes virus is an engineered bio weapon, shuts down whole country instantly
>facial recognition AI-enabled temperature-sensing CCTV cameras track down every infected individual in the country
>every single person with the virus located and quarantined, spread stopped instantly
>USA CDC completely fucks up the tests because it's a bio weapon unlike anything seen before
>USA now can't let all the old people die after China heroically saves their population
>no choice but to shut everything down, causing economic Armageddon
>China now virus-free while USA thrown into economic turmoil
>USA HUMILIATED

make important decisions

whats worse is i only work in a convenience shop and cunts still ask me if we have some really obscure product that clearly isnt out on the shelf as if we have a magic supply of every product in the world we are just holding back

any audiobooks on youtube i should listen to for beddy times?

I like alan partridge audiobooks, david mitchell audiobook, stephen toast audiobook

alri bince?

bit of everything

books are for fags

>be retarded brit
>make this post

>think about getting takeaway
>decide I'll have a cheaper, healthier and more satisfying meal if I cook myself
Based?

dont ignore me binceyy

is the american or british office better?

Why are yanks always like this?

British

*looks at flag*

american

why are you always retarded?

not bince

i remember eating peeps and wagon wheels one time while we were doing something like that.

Would rather be in jail right now, we're effectively imprisoned at the moment and I reckon jail banter is unreal

I remember eating Alanahs face off when I was fucking her Emmutt

*shanks you for being a nonce*

Take your meds boy

youtube.com/watch?v=gzVnm6yN23U

Now im fuckin all your friends cuz u run your mouth like I knew you would

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Is it true yanks lost all the pension funds because of corona lmao

Do I go to bed or do I read more of Gravity's Rainbow? I've knocked off a good 200 pages in the past couple hours

Business idea: give desperate people loans with high interest rates

chinas death toll is estimated to be between 20000-30000 in wuhan alone because they didnt record a single individual in the “official” toll that hadnt been tested and confirmed positive for corona virus before death

worlddata.info/average-penissize.php

WHAT THE FRICKAROONY

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Neither has anybody else

Howling.

aye lad based indeed, been sorting all my own meals since I started working from home

>US Navy commander sacked for speaking out about virus on ship

But you sheep will still bang on about muh china liars

t. paddy o'zhang

poster below is a paki

No highway, freeway, motorway
No bus, no boss, no rain, no train

Genuinely hate the CCP so much.

its just cringe. it just cant stop doing fake cringe shit to try and get clout. its a clout chaser and nothing more

cannot wait for my morning coffee
slathering at the thought

didnt have any to begin with :/

Tolkien or CS Lewis?

IM NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BASELINE

depends

>le hobbit man or a christfag prig
for me, it's lord dunsany

Tolkien completely outclasses that clown.

redpill me on truro

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im an incel lads, very much an incel
are you incels too?