/brit/

>canada has implemented a mortgage freeze but not a rent freeze
landlords stand to make MORE money from this
sickening

me? tall, muscular, big dick
what more can i say

fucked it

point and laugh at him

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what height is that

my girlfriend is fat but i still love her. she's the kindest and most loving person i've ever known.

>she is dead

tragic. look at those limbal rings.

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did anybody fucking ask? thats twice now, fuck off you lanklet piece of shit

I haven't seen my abs in 7 years.

just more to love really

wahey

the incel is here

what is a yank "community college"?

Christ alive

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She could always be...... better

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me? 6'0 king of manletoids, muscular as fuarkkkk and average 6" willard

please lock up your daughters

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me on the left impatiently waiting for my scran

lads is it normal for marijuana to make you feel a bit weird and crazy? not in an extreme way, but just a bit like you're in a dream

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>tfw no fat cuddly gf to make me food

you checked under the wardrobe?

you reckon if i gave her the shag of her life just beforheand she would see the world in a new light and decide to live?

calling someone an incel on chon is like going to china and calling someone a chink

>still no UK and france updates
What are they plotting

she got a grotty arsehole?

the old testicles are starting to shrink a bit lads

str*ghtoids be like: NOOOOO IM NOT A SUPERMODEL I`LL DIE ALONE
gays be like: *gets fat and hairy and bums an endless supply of twinks and tranners*

seriously lads im about to do it
just you watch

looks like tim on the left

I built my portfolio up to 10 units over 5 years. Things were tough but I kept moving forward. However this last couple of years has been the hardest. A tenant flooded the unit 4 times and then denied it and sued me. We started down the rezoning road on a property and the tenants left, so now the home is vacant and no-one wants to rent for only 12-18 months. The government enacted several anti-landlord policies and anti-real estate policies, which dropped all my home values $300,000.

Adding up my losses over the last two years its around $450,000. It hurts, I can't deny it. Some things have gone well and some have gone really badly. My cash reserves went to $0, which meant I was one tragedy away from bankruptcy. The only thing keeping me going is the long-term outlook, knowing that if I just don't quit I will make a million dollars over 25 years.

Advice, comments, questions, please. I really need to talk about this with like-minded people.

>no kind fat gf who doesn't shave her pubes

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probably yeah

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its crazy that most of the people in this thread would have to look up at me

White women are whores, Indian women aren’t, simple as

Fingered her round the back of AA years ago

>but i still love her. she's the kindest and most loving person i've ever known.
I don't know this feel
my ex's have always been very pretty, but I never loved them or felt loved, it was just lust

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well the fat ones are always jolly

no it's cute and pink and i slip a finger up there sometimes when i'm eating her out

>not even the royals are immune

what do we do now lads

6 foot in ireland is prob like 6'5 everywhere else tbf

what a waste

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Need to suck these dry

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How often do you smoke?

what if they're lying about being infected?
how old are they? they should have died a long time ago but are still alive somehow

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finna read a book, 999 to go

>teehee im so like depressed and stuff

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>nooo the people with the best doctors on this planet will die of corona

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Our average height is taller than USA, UK and Australia

dont get this meme

lmfao
retard dad came bursting in my bedroom the other day shouting at me telling me he'd taken all his money out the bank because the country is on it's knees and the banks were about to collapse and i should do the same
he just realised he hasn't got money in his account to pay for stuff now so asked me to transfer him some money if he gives me cash
can fuck right off

Wonder why she did it

would

what book?
may I recommend Thomas Payne's age of reason?

if you were going to neck yourself what would you do beforehand? may aswell do something noteworthy

well it does have a straw so crack on

2 year associates degrees, usually for technician jobs, trade school, or get cheap college credits to transfer to a 4 year university

just took a massive rip of me bong and felt literally nothing
not a fucking thing lads
not a fucking thing
nada
nil

ah yes a mass toil facebook message
>89 unread messages
great

youtube.com/watch?v=Gjha0fgJnfA
steaming some eggs lads

>Charles dies of the 'rona
>William becomes King next
I think I found out who started this shit guys

Numbers not announced yet
This is bad
Thousands probably dead

not too often and I only have access to high potency edibles from the dispensary because my neighbors will complain if they smell any smoke. I've never smoked before so I'm not sure what that feels like

14 year old brother just revealed at the dinner table that he snuck out earlier to buy crisps from the offy

fucks sake
this idiot family will be the death of me

Had a born-blind girl like and message me and even though she’s fairly ugly she must have liked what I wrote which is sweet, she’s also a piano technician, pretty cool job for a blind person

Still not matching with her because I’m a heartless bastard but that’s the closest I’ve come to not caring about looks

tolerance obvs

stop smoking weed its runtish and degen

I can't tell you that

chad probably rejected her

well she's dead meanwhile /brit/ are too scared to go through with it, and continue to rot in misery

need a born blind gf

litttle brother ate my last scotch egg so ill be having words later

Would probably marry my gf

>Army chinook "carrying oxygen tank and medical equipment" seen landing at Balmoral, where Prince of Wales is self-isolating after COVID-19 diagnosis

he's gonna die lads

ARCHITECT

I'd prefer a blind girl because I hate seeing myself in the mirror and if she was blind then she'd not have to see me either.

yeah but to not feel a fucking thing though
come on
not a thing
nothing
and i packed it too and added the shit from the bottom of my grinder
nothing
fuck all
zilch

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So you're the yappy one taking everything uber serious? You're like my neurotic sister. I be out and about working every day on site, I dont give a fuck about 'rona. My co-workers dont give a fuck about 'rona.

Sure it is, you mischievous little leprechaun

just blew a chinook outside balmoral lol whoopsies

Got with a chubby girl and just couldn't get sexually aroused
Don't know how people can deal with the saggy boobs, rolls, weird dimply bum etc

Maybe girls feel the same with my skinny body

>tfw you'll never be attractive enough to make a girl neck herself

girls don't ask guys out silly

Yeah it’s cool because you know she’s not with you for your looks

Problem is when you’re blind you can’t exactly keep up with your looks either

Nah, it will be there just in case he starts dying or in case he has infected lots of the staff etc.

6'5 man next to hibernians

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Yeah it is little guy, this information is a google search away
*pats your little babby head*

oo you're ard

ireland on the ropes

>OH GOD I HAVE TO SPEND AT LEAST A MONTH WITHOUT CHAD LICKING MY CUNT AND MY BETA ORBITERS BUYING ME EVERYTHING I CANT HANDLE THIS I CANT *panic attack ensues* I CANT I CANT *proceeds to down a bottle of shaken pepsi and rainbow skittles*

Sopranos rewatch

me on the left

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>saggy boobs, rolls, weird dimply bum

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post photos of your sisters undies

virgin freak

Reminder that Prince Charles is gay and there was a media blackout about 15 years ago after he was caught getting sucked off by one of his male staff.

>NOOOOOO!!!!11 YOU CANT BE OUT AND ABOUT! WE'RE ON A QUARANTINE THE GOVERNMENT SAID YOU CANT DO IT NOOOOO STOP ITTTT!!!!

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Pahahahajahaha

You could do it for her pretty easily. It also means you could control what your gf looked like etc which is an unusual privelege.

Ah yes, too thick to be worried about elderly loved ones

kill some people i don't want alive after i'm gone

every gf i've ever had (except for one) has approached me first

how can i get a gf who doesnt shave her fanny totally bald?

hibs is in scotland

got turned away from tesco today, the police were outside checking people's shopping lists to see if they were buying essentials, my shopping list of "sweets, crisps and those soft bakery cookies" was deemed non-essential

(I didn't have the nerve to lie tbf, they were also checking people's bags on the way out)

*steals your pot of gold*

Y’all said “2020 finna be a movie”, yea bro, ‘Home Alone’

you've never picked a gf?
grim

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>shopping list
this isnt 1960 and you're not a 50 year old women, nice lying twat

Went out earlier
Still a few people out and about

Have sex

*clefts your head in twain*

dont care
post your sister's chebs

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hibernia
oh nonononononono

if the country goes to the dogs his money will be worth less than toilet paper anyway

would've just pretended to leave then turned round and roundhouse kicked them all in one sweep no messing simple as

Think I’m in love with my twink toilmate, we’ve been carpooling recently and I’ve looked over at him and imagined us making out in the car

When this is all over I’m going to drink champagne, fall in love, and head straight to Clarks to get my feet measured in that weird machine

Just tell her you like a bit of bush

Mummy May's legacy

issa bop ladz

youtube.com/watch?v=XtLvlaGJJEU

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never go looking for it really, just opportunistic x

toilfu followed me on the 'gram
i never bothered to follow her because i don't want to see pictures or stories of her with her bf haha

been catfished again lads

oh suck your mum you boring bastard

next time drive your car full speed into a wall instead
the less faggots the better

easy bait

>making out
FOY

Was in Tesco yesterday and heard one of them on about introducing mandatory shopping lists, the worker goes and gets your stuff and brings it to the till or self service checkout

*starts sucking my mum (milk)*

beta males are the reason why modern women are so shit

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does it sound normal or am I just a latent schizo?

Looks like you've replaced her good will with bitter rancour hahahaha yessss maaaan you truly are the winner, you're the winner, we have a winner, winner winner chicken dinner you just WON bro!

good evening gentlemen
is this the british culture general?

>only son

She has three sons user

illegal post.

stop making up these elaborate bent stories you fucking virgin

put away an entire red velvet cake lads, phwoarr was peng

Unironically good system

Look at this absolute unit
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angus_MacAskill

Records says he is the tallest non-pathological giant in recorded history (7 ft 9 in, or 2.36 m) and had the largest chest measurements of any non-obese man (80 inches, or 200 cm).

His early adult weight was 425 pounds (193 kg). His shoulders were 44 inches (110 cm) wide, and the palm of his hand 8 inches (20 cm) wide and 12 inches (30 cm) long; his wrists were 13.5 inches (34 cm) in circumference; his ankles measured 18 inches (46 cm) in circumference; by 1863 he was wearing boots 17.5 inches (44 cm) long. His feet were probably around 16 inches long and 8 inches wide.

Queen Victoria heard stories about MacAskill's great strength and invited him to appear before her to give a demonstration at Windsor Castle, after which she proclaimed him to be "the tallest, stoutest and strongest man to ever enter the palace", and presented him with two gold rings in appreciation

Wrong

dont want some vile working class CUNT touching my shopping, god i hate poor people

haha yeah you really owned me huh :(

*dabs on the English*

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do you normally consider sentence long posts "elaborate stories"

Strictly speaking yes

hey is fellow 'merican fren around? said you'd help...

tismo having another episode

does your mum ever not smell of shit

probably had a HGH tumour on his brain

>vitamin C

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if you dont have the 'tism you need to go back here
reddit.com/
reddit.com/
reddit.com/
reddit.com/
reddit.com/

cape breton fucking MENTIONED

nah

>google it
>its true

Who the fuck is Edward

pa is macrodosing vitamin C to ward off the rona

prefer not to say

he's specified as non-pathological so probably didn't. he grew that big from pure genetics.

gew on son

fuck off virg

Armpits smell like seaweed

MAKE ME

How tho, his parents were normal size

He must have had a pituitary tumour

Lads, keep it under your hat but I've found the cure for coronavirus

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>yeah me and my imaginary bent boyfriend did this bent thing that never happened

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is it forsythia?

How do you know when you have a fever? My chest and neck are warm but my forehead is normal

rate my car

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Fuck I used to love this album

Kek that poster wasn't me

Got a head like a potion seller

>non pathological giant

What does that mean

wogtastic

grimmmmm

i am going into battle and i require your strongest potions

Got a bit of a headache and sore throat, is it over for me lads?

i would fucking slay anyone in a rap battle

how does my dna match london? am i part paki or ngubu?

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>finish essay and send it off
>realise after that of 2 the citations are from same person marking it
>journal conclusion was opposite of what I said
Haha no first for me

listening to korn and slipknot

Requiescat in pace

>from tomorrow i have to stand at the shop door and limit the amount people allowed in at once

should be fun

mate that's clearly a draught of vampire warding +2

He doesn't do much.

You are not strong enough for my potions

yeah probably

You can't handle my potions, traveler. They're too straight for you

based wigger

virge

Symptom of the rona is a fever specifically in the chest or back, not the forehead. Stay home lad

Why is this general so reddit?

going to spark you out if you say shit to me you little spastic

what car is it

white people invented rap

MY POTIONS ARE TOO STRONG FOR YOU TRAVELER

youtube.com/watch?v=XExES6uB2v8

imagine the smell

will absolutely heem you if you don’t let me in you horrible little scrote

what is this potion gimmick its very reddity oh dear

not staying indoors tomorrow

triumph spitfire