The cringe slag gf edition
/brit/
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we're going like italy and spain lads
1 week away
lads saying we were 2 weeks away last week were right
>the cringe slag
Cool it with the racism ok guys.
when will you learn
>All the virgins dissing the elderly
They fought the Germans you fucking NEET's, they actually HAD sex, what have you done with your life other that procreate with a gym sock and shitpost on /brit/? Well? Answer me!?
you're closing down or still trying that herd immunity thing
THIS.
SO.
MUCH.
if the chinese government asked me if i had coronavirus i'd just say no. what are they gonna do lol?
Am currently eating pork and beans while listening to Pork and Beans. Another one off the bucket list.
it comes from CHJINA
it's called the chinese virus because it comes from china
mummy's got a sore head and isn't feeling too good
'rona methinks
>Corona virus
Boring
cursed number lads
gonna be dead within the week
am a fascist and a landlord. treat my renters as people because they are my people.
*chases you down the street coughing at you*
London will be under lockdown by tonight
I don't get why the sent the uni students home to their parents. Surely they are better kept on campus where they can only infect other zoomer faggots
If Hitler had asked me to get on a train I'd have just said no, what is he gonna do lol.
> US President Donald Trump on Wednesday said his administration will invoke the Defence Production Act, a move which will see rapid expansion of domestic manufacturing of key medical supplies and equipment, including masks and gloves, to combat the coronavirus outbreak in America.
literally happening
JINA
I
N
A
any favors for rent stories
In what sense? Political or viral?
ours is letting us stay on campus
>They fought the Germans
not really, maybe a few yeah but you would have to be in your 90s to be a ww2 vet and even then relatively few actually fought
t. policeman bob
I hope DOOM Eternal isn't another 5 hour barely a waste of time. Maybe I'll try Wolfenstein
they are all to mentally weak to care for themselves in crisis, so send em home to muumy
How long until it becomes a nationwide lockdown?
THIS
Need to dip my soldier in her yolk if you know what i mean
Even so, they still had sex
104 dead
why are there so many chinks in ireland?
Wish I was in Canada right now
Friday announcement, they have told the police chiefs and army to be on standby
t.friends in highplaces
>Hurr durr get fooked bewmer
Cambridge telling thousands of international students to just fuck off back to their own country at their own expense within 3 days of an email lol
Absolutely savage
viral
we half the number of beds italy have too
MILLIONS DEAD
going for a drive to clear my head
Peterborough mentioned
that's the new number from UK??! jfc
Honestly you people laugh at toilet paper hoarders, but you really dont have enough toilet paper yourselves. The average person uses 1 roll per day. If you have a family of 4, that's 28 rolls a week. Over 100 a month. TP rolls will be worth their weight in gold in a few months, because everyone needs it.
Based rovers lad.
I have a sore throat and chesty cough. So self-isolating.
But if I am covid-19 positive, I've probably had it for days and infected others. So I can't see how it will be contained.
I wouldn't be surprised if it's spread to half the kids in London and the surrounding area.
>including masks and gloves
oh, I thought we didn't need them
Knowing BoJo 3 days later. Eton is closed by the way, they closed early.
think italians are lying about these numbers, over exaggerating
looking for sympathy in my opinion
got a nasty pain in my foot
is it because i stubbed my toe or is it the c-c-cOR0nAR viRUs?
only thing now is whether they say we can "work from home" to do the rest of the course (its been put online), or have to return to unit to do it. sincerely hoping the former. i mean i dont mind goign back i just dont want to have to do it out of an office. i wont.
Southern fairys over reacting again nowt in North
This lad will be a millionaire in 3 months
Pools closed due to AIDS and stingrays and stingrays with AIDS
yea it's inevitable i suppose
don't understand why the government aren't doing way more testing
Hampshire: 69
Southwark: 58
Westminster: 58
Kensington and Chelsea: 49
Richfags enjoying their skiing trips no doubt.
>China is now on the way back
>Europe on full on lockdown
>Military being used to enforce martial law
>Medical facilities under stress
>Chinese Military mobilizing on the border
no. I treat them as people because they are my people. Would never abuse my fellow countrymen or women.
>I have a sore throat and chesty cough
>I wouldn't be surprised if it's spread to half the kids in London and the surrounding area.
you fucking wrong'un
not sure what you mean lad
they are all purebred irish heffers
paedophilic horrid little nonce bitch
any zoomers in?
>The invisible enemy
What does he mean?
london has fallen
chinavirus
'gers
alri
China still fucked
Wish I was a good ‘ol Dixie boy from a Georgian farm in the 70s drafted into Vietnam ngl
Live in Westminster and am unaffected
Jews
I wish
me in west london
I’m so scared I just want this to go away
racism
>The average person uses 1 roll per day
not here lad, we have body morphologies that don't attract passing space debris.
Any ISTPs in?
ignore him, literal chink shill who believes china is only getting 1-2 new cases a day, like imagine actual believing the propoganda of a communist dystopia
Rangers FC? Based yankoid
ooo ur hard
Trump isn't trying to be a racist by calling it the Chinese virus. If you actually look at the microbe under a microscope it actually has slanted eyes
I don't understand how everybody makes a single roll of toilet paper last so long. I poop at least four times a day, and I need a roll of toilet paper every time. First, I take a bunch of TP to layer the toilet seat so my butt doesn't get cold. Secondly, I place a wad of TP into the toilet bowl so that the water doesn't splash up. Thirdly, I can't poop all at once, so I go through multiple stages of pooping out a little nugget, and wiping everytime I do so. Once I'm empty, I take the rest of the TP left on the roll and cover up my poop, so that I can ensure that everything flushes properly. I can't be the only one who does this, right?
Thats a lot of likes
fake, has to be
>>yea it's inevitable i suppose
It wasn't, it was delayable if lockdown measures were implemented immediately, as seen in Hong Kong and Singapore. Denmark locked itself down last week, and Poland did too, and there are like 10 cases in Poland.
Can't believe people are begging the gov for martial law
curry pot noodle and tayto beef and onion down the gullet
government and media have done a number on you
just make sure you have enough of the essentials and you'll be 100% fine
don't be
you and everyone will die someday
if this is it, let it be so
simple as
for me it is microsoft teams
rutland not on the map
The virgin lockdown
I was saying Marshall Law
lol worded badly. But your nonce-addled brains would interpret it like that.
>"work from home"
>Boss demands I stay logged into some microsoft group chat shit and update it every hour on my work progress
I have never wanted to quit so much
make that 2 tayto beef and onion
tbf he does have that sick backflip move
>beeg
uh...foot and mouth disease much? hello hello
0.00000000 cases in aberystwyth
>In the Local Authority of Bath and North East Somerset, there are a total of 3 confirmed cases.
pls no
is it racist to call sweet and sour pork "chinese food" now?
i mean it comes from china but oh no it's racist to say something comes from where it comes from now
who else /drinking4corona/ tonight?
get some fybogel from your local pharmacy, drink it once a day after your evening meal. shit all comes out real easy, no messing about and all in regulation sizes, greased for a quick smooth passage by the drink.
Not enjoying this quarantine one bit
Don’t know what the fuck I’m gonna do for the next three months as uni is suspended and I’ve got no work
is lockdown really sustainable though? what happens when you reopen and the virus starts spreading again? lockdown a 2nd time?
doesn't seem like a long term strategy
but nobody knows anyway
i live on my own and now i don't go outside i rarely put more than just my t shirt on so when i take a shit i just have a cheeky shower and go to town with soap in me bum and then i'm sorted
that's pretty amazing if russia has really done 80k tests with less than 150 positive results
i want this foot and mouth disease
wahey
same man
will be fun for the first 2 weeks or so but i`ll soon be back to my miserable neet mindset
Hasn't jumped the species barrier yet then
Managed to pick up the last pack in Aldi lads
gubmint will have to start handing out ration packs
>pharmacy
I don't have hundreds of dollars to spend on pooping
got 30 cans of guinness my laaad my laaaaaaad
fuck's sake
Yes it is. And your post has been reported.
centuries of inbreeding has immunised the welsh bvlls
has the gov given an estimate of unconfirmed cases?
The time to increase the tariffs on China is now
he would have prevented this
does that work on mac os and linux?
I really hope you’re right
they're not
but the people who want to impose martial law will start pretending people are asking for it so they can impose it without any organised resistance
remember, once the government takes away a civil liberty, people have to die before you get it back
what if a few bokkles of speckle 'en is the cure to 'rona
Only 8 in North Yorkshire
china will be punished over this
I'm stocked up for about a month. Wish me luck.
nah it's not racist
most "chinese" food you get in the UK are just jury rigged cantonese (aka: hong kong) recipes adapted to western palates
8 million as of 17 Mar 20
Apparently the divorce rate is spiking in China post-quarantine
got 9 cans of carling awaiting consumption this evening
might get some harp later
is that alright wi you de lad
All the lads are just sitting in the gaff too, nothings on and I’m home from uni. This is shit.
IT'S
JUST
A
FLU
7.7 billion
Yeah but I haven’t even had kids yet
I’m not ready to die
based
bronsonvitamins.com
16 dollar, 2 month supply
Banks in Ireland offering at least a three month freeze on mortgages and loans due to Covid19
thejournal.ie
What's happening in the UK lads?
this corona aint shit its all for the gram
We don't but as far as we do know it works much better than doing nothing or this meme social distance but nothing is officially closed shit. Any major metropolitan area with more than 1 million people should be in full lockdown. UK are so dumb to not do this after seeing Italy and Spain. Spain already regrets not doing it.
just bought this
what happened to his no alcohol march
>liberals are the ones taking COVID 19 most seriously
It really makes you think, huh?
It's actually concerning me a bit that on Twitter they're saying London is going into lockdown.
I will be FUMING
About to find out mate, Bojo going live soon
got 30 cans of guinness but i'm not going to drink them tonight
thumbnail game coming on strong
Wasn't aware Spain was a person capable of emotions.
haha
Got some guinness as well but decided to crack open the promethazine instead tonight.
my arms nearly snapped off carrying two 10 can carling packs in my arms on the way back from the shop
such a weak runt lol
the utter STATE of those tabs
Was 10,000. Then 20,000. Vallance now thinks between 30,000-55,000.
madagascar shutting down shipyards
saudi arabia handing out gas masks
brazil exterminating bats
greenland declaring martial law
china executing the infected
Remember when he was flexing about Trump blocking travel to Europe but not for the UK, only for him to then block us too the very next day? Fuck me, what a joke of a man.
Howling
Wartime Mark innit
you're right i think
it seems as though we are constantly behind the curve on this
just been to the gym and it was practically empty apart from me
US bioweapon
>big
*sparks up a zoot*
*takes two puffs*
*passes it to rorke*
think about the people are trapped abroad and can't get home due to flights being grounded
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
same thing as always happened
massive pandemic
lads...
Yankified try hards
where's last years snow
Why are papers even allowed to report this shit lol?
7 million to go to match the amount of old people in Korea
mad really
this isn't british culture.
Based God culling the boomers.
just going to drink the 29 cans tonight deeee lads and have just the 1 for my birthday deeee lads and tghen after that its no drinking
>ass source news
pasta niggas be like
mama mia this cough is no gouda
>europe now has more deaths than asia in corona virus
yea this is all too convenient for the chinese communists
kek this is me
the real coronavirus was the friends we made on the way
its the FT, they get all the really important stuff first so that investeors know whats coming.
another 33 dead.
I can’t handle this anymore lads
Should just ‘cide now
Uganda be kidding me
I can't stop looking at this
>ugly jaundiced fingers
>fedora theme
>steam
>cheap, nasty monitor and speakers
diabolical image
@-_-@
EVERY SECOND
why would they not be allowed to report it? not sure i see your point
they're also the most likely to believe what the media tells them
haha sirry lao why should be more crean
howling, had this setup for like 5 years though
a lockdown means rioting and people robbing people's homes lol
oh bore off
let me know when it hits 100,000 and i'll start getting worried
Why does a young woman literally have to do anything and you pathetic wankers will save all their pictures and videos like they're the best thing ever? You know you're all to blame for how women won't date guys equal to them in looks in the modern era. Putting the most plain girls on a fucking pedestal like they're all 10/10s.
It's already 208,000 dead m8
>104 dead
Capitalist Britain will have more deaths than socialist China
Wake up serfs
this
Because of what happened in Italy.
They reported that day or the day before they were locking down Lombardy so everybody just fled, spreading it to the rest of the country.
mad how other major cities of the UK are so globally disconnected they have like 50 cases between them whereas a single are of london has like 70
Doubt it
story of life innit
fresh start tomorrah de lad
nary a pixel
Well the UK was behind the curve but that's wasn't where Boris, Whitty and Vallance wanted to be it seems.
bit anxious about going in to work tomorrow night as i haven't been in for a week
i know we're slow but i have no idea how slow, no official word about any changes to hours
happy easter lad