/brit/

Lads I can drive vroom vroom

>some people will not get the virus

LOL

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youtu.be/sW00p9VJ34A

hahahahhaha retard

/brit/ isn't one person, reddit.

She'll mongle your cock!

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ARE we all in here though?

aye

/birt/ is laughing at us lads....

>dude did you know that, like, the USA are evil nazis, and like, communism is good?
You think you're a real radical but you just post the same basic bitch Chomsky drivel that every stupid lefty uni student believes. It's rubbish, mate.

So the EU budget will not only have to address the gap in the budget made by Brexit but also the aftermath of Coronavirus

english people are just better than germans

>280
want janny back

ladies and gentlemen, the president of the united states of america, Toilet Bog Fart

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this is why the seething german is here

>get a new passport while abroad
i absolutely shall not

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trumpdonald.org

are we actually all in here

no

>covid-19

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fuck knows

just washed my hands lad

mental how people communicate like this

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checked

shearer

twitter.com/toonarmy_com/status/1237661091620163584

what produces these specimens

ikr
for me? its Covid 17

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NOT my bollocks

bfs family are all death or hard of hearing
should probably learn it

So what they’re saying is I can’t meet up with tinder slags for 12 fucking weeks

imagine shagging a deaf girl and she signs YES

the aussie early thread spammer needs arresting

Beethoven was death

they don't sign they just moan really awkward. Sound like broken tubas

Chomsky hates China.

Going to make some cheese on toast

don't even know why i'm promoting this thread when he tried to disrupt my /birt/ earlier tbf
suppose i'm just too forgiving and compassionate and that x

Firmly bet he’s that nonce who posts that anime doge thing with the pink hair

>UK chief scientific adviser Sir Patrick Vallance says the latest figures show the UK is three weeks behind Italy rather than four as previously thought.

UK cases today 1543
Italy cases 3 weeks ago today 221

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOURE ALL ABSOLUTELY FUCKED

Puttering

disgusting

Chomsky looks like he's knocking on death's door

I've shagged a deaf girl and they sound like dory making whale noises

I see the Coronavirus as a challenge to dominate

philstar.com/business/2020/03/16/2001314/philippines-reports-cases-h5n6-bird-flu-nueva-ecija-quails
>Philippines reports cases of H5N6 bird flu in Nueva Ecija quails

WEW LADS

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herd immunity is going just as Boris has foreseen it

Doesn't make your entire worldview any less basic bitch, mate. You are intellectually and politically shallow.

no its the nonce who posts the actual underage girls and talks about 14 year olds on ferries

We've been testing more than anyone in europe that's not Italy right now.
Can you give it a rest it's getting a bit boring.

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>British Govt reaction is extremely lax compared to mainland Europe
>The public wants stronger action and clearer information
>Prime Minister just tells everyone not to go to the pub, doesn't even close them
Ahhh yes this is going to go brilliantly

I did try and delete it after you posted lad but it was too old.

I suppose the NEETs don't mind what they post in but normaltons haven't got time for /birt/, to hard to find in the catalog.

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Why is he changing his tactics now then

Imagine not realising how intertwined, geographically close and likely to follow a similar route we both are.

screaming

Lads I'm trying to find a William Wordsworth poem, but can't remember the title or how it goes.
It's about how after travelling abroad and he returns home he realises how much he loves England.
Help me out?

>H5N6
>Four known cases have occurred
>Three were fatal

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>I NEED TO GOVERNMENT TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO AND WHAT NOT TO DO

You're literally 7x worse than Italy

love the way he says "mr puzzle"
youtube.com/watch?v=l07agkG_cSs
mista pahzzl :)

That's when Italy weren't really testing or monitoring the situation around Lombardy. Most likely they had way more thousands back then and didn't know it. We've tested over 40,000 people, Italy tested 2000 at that point.

Ate some bad chicken last night now I’m absolutely pissing out my asshole

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No matter how many people die from COVID19 it will still be less than died in Ireland from an absence of potatoes.

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a good litmus test for competent state governors here has been whether or not they close bars, restaurants, public events, etc. as opposed to simply "urging" the general public to stay home

execute order herd immunity

youtube.com/watch?v=w82a1FT5o88

Can you go find me the amount tested from 3 weeks ago please.

he isn't. he's just saying so to keep the dumb livestock (the herd animals) in check

put a banging donk on it

I am, the Nigger.

not sure if i had coronavirus or not.
about 5 days ago i started feeling sick. had coof, fever, sore throat, muscle aches, thigh chest. but today i feel pretty much fine.

Don’t get people who are crying about not being locked down. Like just don’t leave the house bro, you don’t need Boris’ approval to stay in

good
fuck the boomers
fuck the sick
fuck the junkies
fuck 'em all
let god sort 'em out
I need muh cheaper housing

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I don't do it to be intellectually superior. Hardly anyone on the "left" will defend China except MLs. Most students are liberals who think China is an evil capitalist "totalitarian regime" and Corbyn is REEUHL socialism.

>Feb 9th 2020 - Sichuan province found H5N6 causing the deaths of 1,840 birds had died in the farm of 2,497, and the rest of the birds were culled.
DOUBLE PANDEMIC LADS

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*puts on my hazmat suit*
alri

>test people
>oh no this is bad for the (((economy)))
>we'll only test in hospitals now so the market doesn't panic :^)

slave mentality

It causes pneumonia unlike a regular flu, probably just sick

>feeding the potatonog

It was my mistake to assume they only fed on starches

whacky Bruce up to his old tricks

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gigacope

I'm just asking him, I'm not engaging in a pointless argument.

>AAAARGH NO SEAMUS NOT THE SPUDS, QUICK SAVE THE POTATOES THINK OF ME OL GRAN SHE'S STARVING QUICK

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Why didn't they just isolate and quarantine the fish you ask?

Turns out they had herd immunity

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German humour

ONLY BRITAIN SOLDIERS ON

It's going well.

British government seems to not be taking it seriously and ineffectually: the British people decide to take it seriously themselves and self-isolate, take precautions independently and individually because they don't trust the govt to get it right. Result: people quarantine themselves, and the govt doesn't need to put in place any authoritarian rules.

The flip side of this, which has actually occurred in some Asian countries alreay: the government puts in place serious rules, and the people generally believe the government is handling the crisis well, they trust them, become reassured, and eventually get too confident and complacent and start going out again, and they end up getting infected.

>irish piping up as if they won't get hit just as bad as britain
lol

utterly beggars believe how its possible to get corona in the morning, suffer some symptoms for 2-3 hours, and then be completely cured by the afternoon. biggest media and public frenzy over nothing in at very least 50 years

Haha mental to think I'd be executed, sentenced to life imprisonment, or lynched by a mob if I ever tried to visit Uganda.

we literally won't

Don't know why I bother, you're so boring. You come in with outlandish shit, I ask you nicely if you can provide some sort of evidence and instead of either admiting to trolling or actually taking the time to back up what you post you just parrot the same catchphrase.
Christ people like you are just utterly pathetic.

aberystwyth will be the last bastion of humanity when you grim city dwellers are wiped off the earth

>yeah were gonna go for herd immunity bro
>shut everything down a week later
>yeah he said he wanted herd immunity but that's now what he meant

kek

why does a jap hate the irish.
they're not connected in any way

found a porn vid of a girl with cerebal palsy getting shagged by a chad

Alri oxford

I agree the British are very sensible in general, I just wish people would stop hoarding.
Honestly reckon a lad in work had it last week. He was fine within 3 days.

im a doomer who spams coronavirus doomsday statistics while investing in the stockmarket

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Your entire country was nearly wiped out by a potato fungus you fucking mong you'd get genocided by a stiff breeze.

Can't just post this without a link now can you

proofs

>outlandish shit

I literally posted verified numbers but keep burying your head in the sand

Sisyphean effort not to wank

the Welsh shall reconquer Britain from the Saxon

youtube.com/watch?v=F5ERFRrXcwY

cant we just get along

>we literally won't

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why didn't they just learn to fish though

you can be gay
you just can't do gay things
have some self control

off to walk around in central london
will be a rush

Where would a lad find that sort of thing, don't want to chance stumbling upon it haha

shut it down boris

youtube.com/watch?v=1pHZg5Yb7qw

CRIMES OF BRITS

YES U OWE

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The sad thing is everyone who deserves death in this country will probably be spared by the virus

Okay now please go and find me the testing numbers. As of today we have tested some 45k cases. How many did Italy test 3 weeks ago? This is all I want to know, why can't you provide this?

Hmm why would a Marxist-Leninist want a race war....seems a bit contradictory

hes in a tough spot because he hates his own people but he worships his ancestors so he comes to /brit/ because its the only place he actually identifies with seeing as his own people spent years fighting and dying to elect a gay paki that kills babies, but lashes out because he thinks hes meant to hate us

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>PS4 fucking dies right as we're all told to stay indoors
For FUCK'S sake.

twitter.com/cnnphilippines/status/1239376894107078656

BREAKING: Agriculture Department confirms the detection of H5N6 or bird flu — a highly-pathogenic avian influenza — in Nueva Ecija

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In a pandemic, yes. Every body from sports to school to universities, offices and pubs are now setting their own policies (way stricter than the gov's worthless advice) because they've been so useless. All have said the government isn't doing great communicating. You need one body to set strict guidelines for everyone to follow or it's all just mix and match nonsense, some schools closed some not some working some not and it spreads.

Spain tried the soft suggest approach and now they are on total lockdown because it didn't work and they are the most fucked after Italy.

wonder if this works on proxy n words too
动态网自由门 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣 臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏 土伯特 唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主 言論 思想 反共 反革命 抗議 運動 騷亂 暴亂 騷擾 擾亂 抗暴 平反 維權 示威游行 李洪志 法輪大法 大法弟子 強制斷種 強制堕胎 民族淨化 人體實驗 肅清 胡耀邦 趙紫陽 魏京生 王丹 還政於民 和平演變 激流中國 北京之春 大紀元時報 九評論共産黨 獨裁 專制 壓制 統一 監視 鎮壓 迫害 侵略 掠奪 破壞 拷問 屠殺 活摘器官 誘拐 買賣人口 遊進 走私 毒品 賣淫 春畫 賭博 六合彩 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Winnie the Pooh 劉曉波动态网自由门

My wife's boyfriend has coronavirus

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anyone itt have corona yet?

>Surrounded on all sides by water teeming with edible sealife
>Starve to death
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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No testing. No cases. 4d chess by Boris if I'm honest

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Imagine we all get pozzed and either die or become immune, then imagine when the other nations finish their lockdowns and us brits still carrying the disease, just symptomless, go out and start another Coronavirus pandemic to all the nationalities that didn’t engage in herd immunity

perfect time to order pc parts online

Tibet is a region of China
It's like Yorkshire

>welsh cuban palestinian
Shan't be reading this tweet.

I do not give coronavirus permission to infect me, my family, or any people/dogs I know, in both the past and the future. By posting this statement, I give my notice to the coronavirus that it is strictly forbidden to infect me, infect anybody close to me, make me I'll, send me or any of my family members into quarantine, or take any other action against me on the basis of my body and/or its contents. The wellness of my body is private and confidential. The violation of my privacy can be punished by law (UCC 1-308-1 1 308-103 and the Rome statute). Note: Coronavirus is now a pandemic and this applies to all other potentially pandemic viruses including Bird Flu.

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Really Makes You Think....

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HeRd ImMuNiTy

b-but tha brits stole me boats so they did they exported all me taters so it is

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any other work from home man in
getting a bit sick of 0 social interaction lads

Isn't the government doing daily conference on TV starting today?

is this real?

Coronavirus: Italian paramedic, 47, died in bed after promising wife he was 'fine'

The paramedic from Bergamo was tested for COVID-19 on Thursday after he and some of his colleagues developed coronavirus symptoms - but less than two days later he died.

His distraught wife Maruska Capoferri said the night before dying, at around 3.30am, Diego told her: "You can go to sleep, my dear, I am not going to die. I just need to find a comfortable position to fall asleep."

She replied: "Why, do you think you are going to die?" When he said "no", she smiled at him and went to another room, L'Eco di Bergamo reports.

They were reportedly sleeping in separate rooms since the beginning of his symptoms.

At around 5.30am yesterday, Maruska went back to check on her husband - but his condition had started getting worse as he had breathing difficulties and then a heart attack.

Maruska, who volunteers for the Red Cross in Seriate, Bergamo, said she gave her husband a heart massage while waiting for the emergency services to arrive.

She added a neighbour of hers, who is a nurse, helped her with the heart massage - taking turns while the ambulance arrived.

Maruska said paramedics arrived about 20 minutes later and did their best to save Diego - who had no underlying conditions - but he tragically died.

"He was one of the 700 health workers, doctors, nurses and rescuers who have already been infected."

me. took the week off . had a cough and a bit of a temperature both easing. hard to tell if im breathless since im confined but do feel a bit of pressure in my chest when i laugh at britposts

Why is bitcoin crashing lads?

should be independent

53 deaths

everyone buying gold

Bro I think you got a faulty caps lock on your keyboard

not in all cases and my lungs did feel a bit messed up for a bit

dont know dont care

Tibet was not part of the Middle Kingdom for most of its dynasties

yeah

You realise Chinese users aren't in trouble for things other people write, yeah?

placebo

DIRTY CHINESE NIGGERS

How the fuck do i get this out and do i need a tetanus shot?

>quit my job a month ago
>mum can't afford the WiFi anymore
>only 10gb of data on my phone
This is going to be awful

>all the mongs self diagnosing

lmao

are people really angry at the concept of herd immunity because bojo mentioned it?

>twitter.com/toonarmy_com/status/1237661091620163584
sheeeeeeeeeeeeearerrrrrrrrrrr sheeeeeeeeeeeeeearer haha sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeearer sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeearer

That's less than doubled

Same reason all the markets are crashing.
Nice quints btw

Well it looks pretty shit when every other leader is updating their country over the weekend and Boris is nowhere to be seen.

Because you just got quints

Yorkshire mentioned.

How do you think camwhores are holding up in these dire times

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dont care zhang is off to the internment camp as we speak

A more accurate comparison would be saying "Wales is a region of England" because the statement is absolutely absurd and idiotic.

>three weeks behind Italy rather than four as previously thought.

'previously thought' being a week ago ?

Forgot pic

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hyperfiatization

you're wrong
japanese people also found spamming xi jinping looks ike winnie the pooh on legaue would have the chinese opponents disconnected lol

Hope you also support independence for Ireland, Scotland, Wales, Cornwall, Isle of Man and England then?

Coronavirus attacks the heart too.
Might as well start working on the herd immunity.

Freedom for Tibet
Freedom for Hong Kong
Freedom for Yorkshire & Humberside

Wales was part of England for 700 years.

fools having their yearly realization that it's worthless and all value is derived from the idea that you can sell it to some other sucker in the future.

twitter.com/RTUKnews/status/1239584711346769920?s=19

Brits really are absolute fucking wankers

lel bravo

twitter.com/LeonKnight_/status/1239269927237963777

Freedom for the Isle of Thanet

just pull it out

humans and apes have a common ancestor but you probably wouldnt agree to being designated a monkey would you

Such a nasty post.

Are you really that stupid?

absolutely BASED lads