/brit /

just opened a bottle of wine
already regretting it

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cant stop licking windows lads

I suppose the government needs to inject some cash into the bottleshops and pokies.

proof golfballs are a gateway drug

did you see any brown people

based
a.) for acknowledging it's the wuhan stinky chunky virus
b.) for kicking its arse

listening to Crackers Talking Shit by Werewolf Hair

corrrrrr

how about i inject my dick into ur boipucci fag

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the close it you idiot

*chinky
** stupid auto correct

je suis en train de le faire.. pourquoi tu me regardes quand meme..

quintessential amer post

please don't more like NORRRR! NOooOooOorrrRRRR

honhonhon j'aime les baguettes

based alizee

it will go bad

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I usually put my plug in after sex so I can keep the cum there as long as possible. When I do push it out I prefer to push it into my undies. I love the feeling of a man's cum drying in the seat of my pants and I love the smell of spunk that's been marinating in my ass for a long time. It's primal and makes me horny for the next hookup.

i'd berry my dik so hard

the “just a flu bro” boys are SHAKING

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dying lads

deary me
*drops dead*

kinda hot actually

immedietly see a problem with this
you'd struggle to build anything on the Ribble Estuary, Dee Estuary, and Morecambe bay

literally is just the flu
italians are elderly and frail

could've spared us from reading that lad
jfc

>deadths

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how many of those 126 are 70 plus I wonder

back off buddy

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why do hotwifes always wear that style of mask in their cuck porn videos

or so I'm told.

favourite boards to bait on lads?
Yas Forums always goes down well as it's so fast and filled with children
Yas Forums is quite easy for the same reasons, anti-american bait goes down especially well
reddit boards like /lit/, /qa/ and Yas Forums are good if you get bored of pretending to be a lefty though i find

me?
don't need to worry about coronavirus since I'm not an 80 year old on life support

far from it
do you have more like

>deadths

yeah this is a good source thanks

most, italy has the oldest population in europe so the death rate isnt exactly surprising

Reckon I'm gonna claim my paid holiday and leave my job, its a good job but I honestly think if I stay in this city any longer I am gonna strangle myself

Just wish I knew what to do once I leave

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What will the great Deano horror film be about?

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It’s been confirmed that at least 50% of people in ICU in Italy are under 70

Yas Forums, it's just like baiting on Yas Forums but you flip to the other end of the so called political compass

>deadths
lmao

gagging for a cigarette

growing my own penicillin

They don't really. Most of the time their face is either blurred, cropped out of frame or just bared for all to see. I would guess however that Venetian masks are associated with deviant sexuality largely due to their appearance in film 'Eyes Wide Shut' featuring an extensive scene where Tom Cruise character attends a secret illuminati meeting with powerful men opening having sex with young masked women.

t. connoisseur of cuckold and hotwife pornography

worst part about boomer types is how they expect the whole world of young people to stop and listen to their fake stories. Like yeah ok gramps but DIDNT ASK

i.4cdn.org/gif/1583956430691.webm

>10 - start
>32 - tries to stop before cumming
>41 - cum
>56 - finished

Move into my place. You'll have to drink estrogen and wear cute dresses, but I'll take care of you.

gagging for some cock

wonder how much our resident chink gets paid to spam /brit/, wonder if i can get a job doing it

LAAAAAADS
>HAPPENING

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What an absolute travesty

Can't believe we actually let this joker manage Glorious Albion

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/asp/ because it's just a shitpost/wind-up board now
you're right about Yas Forums but don't go there much

not scared of deadth me

What city m8

enjoy going on Yas Forums and calling out their problematic attitudes about women

just read a whatsapp message and now reckon society is on the brink of collaps

BASED. I BELIEVE IT ENTIRELY

How's the corona situation in britain

that's just life in detroit lid

matthew hussey is like the PC patrice o'neal

disgusting. no better than an obese girl

My home city; London

/asp/ is a wonderful place

le unanimity der mannus

you're so clever aren't you m8

is matthew hussey related to mike hussey?

is it still a raging inferno over there

Imagine not taking the every 100 year event pandemic seriously. You boys are in for a shock

gfs drunk and is messaging me saying shit she hates thinking about me being with my previous gfs and is now asking if she is prettier than my previous gfs. annoying bint.

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>nedved in defence
>falcao in midfield
o i am laffin

>no word from cheadle in over 48 hours
yeah it's just a flu you dopey cunts

Literally the only government measure put in place is advising people to "wash hands regularly".

Cases going up every day. Today's increase was the largest influx of new cases yet.

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To be honest, the best age range to die (aside from old age after you've lived a fulfilling life) is probably as a child or young adult. That way you won't be leaving behind a partner or children who may be financially dependant on you.

melanin-enriched digits

ding-dong diddley based

got a painful lump on me bum. got arse cancer, going to die.

at least it was before minorities fucked everythang up

No it's been pissing down rain for weeks. Anyway, It's a big continent lad, the entire thing wasn't on fire. Didn't get any fires up my way.

You should not go to them
Let them come to you
Just like I do
Just like I do

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youtube.com/watch?v=wR7qdStzS4s

thoughts?

What's this song fella

Big simpin NYC

hate clingy insecure bitches

Just occurred to me that there is at least one 20 something year old in the U.K. that is going to die a virgin from corona and I’m absolutely HOOTING

80+ cases here, pretty much all people coming from the alps

i know the feel. i took her virginity, but i had a ew things before her. we'v been together for 10 years now but it still comes up how much my past sex life haunts her. she is very insecure about her looks even though she is perfect. somehow she thinks shes ugly or something. t's annoying, but i feel her pain because i love her, the pain is sincere. relationships are a pain the butt

who gives a fuck. Based angel of pestilence cutting a swathe through the population can only be a good thing for me, my sexual and work value will skyrocket overnight. Sure, I might die, but I'm willing to roll those dice.

Virgins don't leave their house so they won't get infected.

Need to dismantle mainstream media.

not the 'rona that bothers me

its the panic buying and survival instinct npcs around me

pozzed a virgins neghole

Ok mong boy

Lads the toilfu has really fucked my head up and I want to cry all the time

She’s nice to me when we’re by ourselves, flirts with me etc but is a bitch to me in a group dynamic

I am so depressed by this.

She’s proper manipulated me, I thought I was stronger than this.

is google broken? (its I Don't Owe You Anything -
The Smiths just in case it is)

Their parents do however

remembering that time i cried when i was 19 and my 15 year old brother came home with a hot girl and i heard them fuck. i was a lonely virgin. the girl as a couple years older than him and i had my eye on her. he got her. was a gut punch.

don't you have elders you care about

BASED

NEETS WILL INHERIT THE EARTH

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boo hoo, go do drugs and cry about it mong boy

Got news for you. The people who have it far outnumber the reported cases. But they just recover from it and go about their day.
World sure has gotten a lot more gullible to msm fear mongering compared to the swine flu days.

ok virgin

Girlfriend prefers room temperature water and sleeps with no pillows whatsoever

Save me

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>gf drunk without you

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re-adding 9mm penis' trip to the wordfilter

kill your ego

how would i go about such a task

Don’t know why anyone would wear clothes in their own home 2bh

the universe would cease to exist

this is just sad. at 19, I was half way done with my undergraduate degree. didn't bang any bitches until I was 26 but when it started to rain, it poured. now? gobs of puss for my taking. not flexin, just the truth

the healthiest way to sleep is on your back without a pillow
cold water makes your body overcompensate and warm itself up

I’ve unironically stopped doing drugs now other than cocaine and booze and Valium

:(

do heroin

the prince william tends to get cold

Great, the new echelons of society will consist of socially retarded NEETs

Can't stop laughing at inappropriate times

why didnt you save yourself for her when she did for you manslut

Even if that were true, a significant % of old people who get it literally die. The ones who might not necessarily die still clog up ICU beds.

Most people aren't afraid of every single person getting the virus and dying but there still seems to be enough going on for the health system to be completely overrun by sick old people. Economy tanking due to uncertainty.

Can't stop wanking at inappropriate times

came across a lot of good gash willing to get porked.

was hoping to be at least 2 inches deep in some quality grade B+ muff by now but the cunt is late AGAIN
vile creatures women

mentally ill faggot

shag her
and FONT

britney spears walked around naked in front of her security guards all the time during her mental breakdown phase

neets are the gilded elite anyway

they spend their freetime reading, lifting and perfecting their skills. they are the modern athenian gentlemen. imageboards are their agora

housemate gets annoyed if I walk around naked

Can't stop pooing at inappropriate times

I have to kiss competitive Pokemon goodbye, I finally got banned from organized play for PM'ing all the female commentators my dick on instagram during a manic episode. It sounds goofy but I was pretty damn good at it, I just never had the time or money to play. In 2016 I got 2nd at a regional winning 1k in prizes, and right before that I got 2nd in the June IC Which was an online tournament with 20k participants. I would encounter guys I knew were elite players online and fucking smash them. I'm completely calm under pressure, playing in front of tens of thousands of people on stream. I think I could have made a serious run at the world championships, but that's gone now.

>they spend their freetime reading, lifting and perfecting their skills

i come from poverty, never had no schoolin. but, i am 29 now, lost my virginity at 22 and have had sex about 1500 times by now. just remembering when i was a sad lonely boy, makes me understand more all the threads and posters here on Yas Forums who are in tears from how alone and touchless they are. i was there too and i shouldnt forget.

>implying you can't work a job and still do all those things
you're a failure in the eyes of society, simple as

le triality der mensch

You sound just like her you fucking robot

hello seething wagey. copy and paste more stuff into an excel spreadsheet today?

can't stop believing and holding on to that feeling

hate to say it but I think I'm in love

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girls became easy to manipulate and control once i became a heroin addict, not even kidding. it's amazing what you can do when anxiety, depression and energylessness are bogging you down.

can't stop deleting threads if the old one hasn't reached page eight

The ting about the ol' 'rona is that you can have and be infecting people long before it ever makes you sick, so all the people that have corona were spreading before they even realised they had corona.

So there are hundreds of people right now walking around not realising they have corona and are spreading it around. So yeah its gonna get pretty bad until a vaccine is found. This is literally just the beginning too. So get comfy lads because A LOT more people are gonna die, it might even be YOU!

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Bros we need backup PRONTO the continentals are swarming

Clogwog fuck off

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can't stop deleting threads if the old one hasn't reached page eight

you cannot perfect anything wihout having 8 of the best hours free