ITT: We come up with heroes with stupider powers than "Internet gas"
>Amish Furniture Man: he has the power over Amish furniture after his uncle Hezekiah's antique handmade clock fell on him and imbued him with the power of all Amish carpentry
ITT: We come up with heroes with stupider powers than "Internet gas"
Nolan Collins
Evan Sanders
Hello goose
Jonathan Allen
Eh... fuck it. Let's just talk about the cute vampire!
Jaxon Flores
LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN
Bentley Sanchez
The Earplug. A scientist melts down a pair of earplugs in a DIY brewery, and distills it into a fine vapor and drinks the condensation, now at will, he can completely prevent himself from hearing ANYTHING, any sound at all. Thus, if music-themed villains are ever going around hypnotizing people through song, he will be immune.
Nathaniel Sanchez
>the power of all Amish carpentry
ngl, that sounds pretty fun and honestly kind of op.
Jose Carter
The Cat Graffitier. Accidentally exposed to steroid-enhanced Fancy Feast, a young man discovered that, for one hour, he had the ability to foretell what kind of cats would arrive decades from now in certain spots by making crappy graffiti art. His predictions may or may not be accurate.
Luis Bennett
The BLACKED
>After gaining the powers of a black man through consumption of interdimensional interracial porn, Ron Johnson from a upper white middle class family in New Hampshire, has gained the ability to run slightly faster than you, is able to instinctively rhyme words to a repetitive loop of music, can shoot anything into any bin or hole a majority if the time, a substantial increase in size to his genitals and probably his most powerful ability, the ability to say the N word.
Gavin Russell
Amina Acid. Once a young woman vacationing in Britain, she was attacked by a Peaceful Refugee who tried to thrown acid in her face, unfortunately due to economic setbacks, he could only throw avocado paste at her in hope the Fatty acids would burn her. Her face now covered in guac until she can find a cloth and some water, she was forced to become a recluse, clad only in towels and bathrobes. But whenever the innocent are in danger, she emerges, armed with the same avocadoes which made her the monster she is, ready to cleanse the pores of crime and bust a nut in the face of evil.
Nicholas Morris
The only passable of the designs/names, honestly.
Carson Phillips
Just change up the color a little bit and give him a less retarded head, and then you have a good vampire hero
Logan Richardson
No fuck off he looks worse than fucking Xandir who is a literal parody
Josiah Martin
Miscarriage of Justice. A pro life forces abortions unto unsuspecting women with his aborto raygun. It shoots a super heated laser on the woman's belly until the fetus exits her body, flopping like a fish in a puddle of boiling blood.
Jeremiah Anderson
>N word pass
shit this guy could beat all the new warriors
Noah Morgan
Wouldn't that be a pro-choicer
Gabriel Nelson
>stupider
Colton Adams
He's like a son of Marceline and Bubblegum.
Chase Robinson
Incest-boy
>After finding his sister's secret lab, he decided to drink all of her chemicals she had in the lab. He accidentally drank a creamy solution of condensed liquid of a book containing information on genetics. Now he fights crimes using the power of book to beat up criminals, but he can only do this while having sex with a fellow family member since one of the chemicals he ingested contained his sister's dna, making his powers work only in that specific situation
Dominic Fisher
>The Fag
>A transvestite college philosophy major from New York University smokes magical cigarettes that give him the power of introspection
Eli Stewart
Johnny Test fanfic?
Julian Reyes
kek
Jace Wood
>Gaymidus
>After An Accident at an Air Force research base trying to create 'Gaydar', Gary Goomer has attained to power to turn any man gay by touch
Jayden White
BEN 10
Dominic Kelly
Culture-man
> a man orchestrated an orgy consisting of a person from each nationality in the world. However he used lube that was radioactively contaminated because the lube identified as herself as radioactive. As a result the man gain abilities of every culture in the world the black rapping skills to Chinese kung-fu to Inuit fishing techniques
Jaxon Peterson
Twitter would love this
Bentley Torres
nice digits
would read as a doujinshi
Christian Rivera
Change-person
> a trans woman who ingested too much cheap dodgy sex change hormones prescribed by her back-alley doctor because he did not have enough money. Now Change-person is non-binary and can change people's genitals to either a vagina, or a penis-vagina.
Charles Myers
Don't even try. user.
section 8 beat everyone to a pulp a long time ago.
Aiden James
ngl, I'd actually read that and not even for laughs.
Noah Hall
This thread is shit, gay shit
Jose Garcia
Cry more Sneedcuck. Nu-Warriors would bomb even if there was no plague.