>"Okay. I'll tell ya. You are the worst person I know. You constantly hit on your best friend's wife; the man pays for your food and rescued you from certain death and this is how you repay him? And to add insult to injury, you defecate all over his yard. And you're such a sponge. You pay for nothing; you always say, "Ooh, I'll getcha later," but later never comes. And what really bothers me is you pretend you're this deep guy who loves women for their souls when all you do is date bimbos. Yeah, I date women for their bodies, but at least I'm honest about it. I don't buy them a copy of Catcher in the Rye and then lecture them with some seventh grade interpretation of how Holden Caulfield was some profound intellectual. He wasn't! He was a spoiled brat! And that's why you like him so much: he's you! God, you're pretentious! And you delude yourself by thinking you're some great writer, even though you're terrible. You know, I should've known Cheryl Tiegs didn't write me that note. She would've known there's no "A" in the word "definite." And I think what I hate most about you is your textbook liberal agenda. How we should "legalize pot, man". How big business is crushing the underclass. How homelessness is the biggest tragedy in America! Well, what have you done to help? I work down at the soup kitchen, Brian. Never seen you down there! You wanna help? Grab a ladle! And by the way, driving a Prius doesn't make you Jesus Christ. Oh, wait! You don't believe in Jesus Christ, or any religion for that matter, because "religion is for idiots". Well, who the hell are you to talk down to anyone? You failed college twice, which isn't nearly as bad as your failure as a father. How's that son of yours you never see? But you know what? I could forgive all of that, all of it, if you weren't such a bore! That's the worst of it, Brian. You're just a big, sad, alcoholic bore! *sigh* Well, see ya, Brian. Thanks for the fucking steak."
"Okay. I'll tell ya. You are the worst person I know...
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Yeah
i know you are but what am i
:^)
I appreciate that for once Seth admits he isn't that funny or insightful.
I'm thinking about we start a religion where the priest and priestess fuck the children at about 13-15 while high on acid. That way they won't be so focused on sex and we can have less angry virgins.
sick roast i dab on his grave yikes
"You see, Connie, you're popular because you developed early and started giving handjobs when you were twelve. But now you can't stand to look at yourself in the mirror because all you see is a whore. So you pick on Meg to avoid the inevitable realization that once your body's used up by age nineteen, you're gonna be a worn-out, chalky-skinned burlap sack that even your stepdad won't want. How's that, am I in the ballpark?"
No six words in fiction are as insufferable as "At Least I'm Honest About It". The only person who's ever made them mean anything besides adding a stratum of ironic hypocrisy to their assholery is The Hound from Game of Thrones.
>t serial rapist
You know as much as I've come to hate the show for its brand of humor I think it's this scene in particular really bothered me since the entire rant could be shut down by Brian pointing out that unlike him Quagmire is a serial date rapist that has actively perved on Louis in the past to the point of actually hiding in a goddamn bathroom to watch her piss. The good he may do at a soup kitchen doesn't count for jack shit if he's the kind of guy that you know for a fact would plow any attractive homeless chick he sees and dump her right back on the street. He's the last guy who should be lecturing someone about their character.
Hasn't Quagmire tried to steal Lois?
>You are the worst person I know
Besides your sister husband? The guy you murdered?
nah brian is still worse, thats kinda the point, quagmire while a piece of shit doesnt own shit to peter, but brian owns him his life.
Based.
No
>brian is still worse
how?
Both are terrible assholes and this should have ended with the two of them fighting it out a la Peter and the Big chicken
Brian's a tremendous fucking tool, but Quagmire is a straight up criminal and a hypocrite. Saying that it's inappropriate for Brian to lust after Louis while doing it himself and taking it much further is retarded.
Why DID they have that "Brian's in love with Lois" subplot?
There is a difference between being a deadbeat and being a repeat sex offender.
Because it's a bad show lacking in original or interesting ideas
based
Plus Quagmire is a deabeat for dozens of kids including the baby girl that has given to his arms but he still abandoned. At least Brian gave some emotional support to his son when the kid needed him the most.
Never got why he called Brian out for his son
Brian turned his son's life around for the better
Quagmire on the other hand gave up and dumped his kid the first chance he got, and will only return in 18 years to pump'n dump her
he's a liberal, while most people here admire rapists and want them to be accepted by society
I think the rant is an interesting window into quagmire, as it shows he is so morally corrupted he doesn't even consider that rape is wrong
to him there's literally no difference between forced and consensual sex and he does consider himself a morally upstanding person
Brian lives with peter in his house, its an i think worse kind of betrayal. He even took advantage of her daughter once causing her to fall in love with him.
Obsessed.
Gee, it's almost like this rant was given to the one character that was actually worse than Brian in quite a few ways, so the rant wouldn't feel quite as cathartic.
Seriously, imagine said by Joe or Cleveland. That'd feel a bit different, wouldn't it?
I think people are very easy to forgive brian simply because quagmire is worse. Like is not even a debate quagmire is trash. But brian is more down most people level, its actually acceptable as a citizen, but he still puts awful shit daily and gets away with it.
>Serial rapist calls the mentally damaged alcoholic who uses his personality as a shield to handle it an awful person
>We're supposed to side with the serial rapist
He didn't take advantage of Meg, she went full stalker on him
The whole point of the rant was a shitty Frank Grimes ripoff, though. It was to have a character say everything the audience doesn't like about another character, so the audience feels vindicated.
Brian's alcoholism is also completely understandable
Always remember that dog years are a thing and Brian is gonna die in a few years while being aware of how shitty a hand he was dealt
He's desperately looking for his short time to have some meaning and constantly failing because he's just average in every way
A lot of people missed that going in and took it at face value.
I remember brian being drunk and kissing her triggering her psycho mode. Thats why louis beating the shit of him was ok.
This and Peter showing her that fire hydrant were satisfying as hell
Sometimes I wonder if Seth regrets not dying in 9/11 like he was supposed to.
>You wanna help? Grab a ladle!
Feeding the homeless creates a bigger issue that shooting them actually solves.
He regrets Family Guy being his biggest thing, he wants to be a singer or make dramas, not do this forever. The first major or even minor VA to quit the show will lead to the end of it.
He deserved the hits for kissing her while drunk, but it's not his fault she's obsessed with anyone who makes her feel valued
>that was actually worse than Brian in quite a few ways
You mean literally every single thing he said he did worse except being a leech, and even so Quagmire is so fucking unprofessional that even this makes little to no sense, nevermind the fact Quagmire was super friendly toawrds Brian before the writers magically made him hate the dog out of nowhere and for no reason, this is bad writing, it's lazy, it's the writers saying "fuck characterization" and using the character as a lifeless puppet, stop defending this trash.
this, and in this case it makes sense
Then we're only left with the kind of people who shoot the homeless
not really. this is the same dog that helped raise his family and married his wife to keep them afloat. with no sex. quagmire goes into their trash and collects used underwear and hair. theyre both attracted to her, but i dont see quagmire stepping up for someone elses family like that
yeah that falls on her parents. shes been attracted to 2 of peters friends already. and quagmire was willing to fuck her. how are they still friends?
He should just make an episode where Peter denies the Holocaust so Fox cancels him.
He doesn't want to burn bridges there because it's all he has.
He tried to turn into a movie director but Ted 2 flopped hard and was bashed by critics, that was the first time I felt bad for him since he openly said that he tried his best and easily could give the sequel for other directors like everyone else at Hollywood do.
This is true.
If we execute people like you this world would be a much better place. Honestly you deserve to die.
A Million Ways to Die in the West isn't bad, but he shouldn't really act in live action stuff.
I advice to watch in pursuit of happiness if you havent already. Some people need a hand in order to recover.
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>Connie D'Amico or Connie DiMico in some episodes, is the most popular girl and the head of the cheerleading squad at James Woods Regional High School where Meg and Chris also attend. Connie is mean and spoiled, and generally is seen bullying Meg. She is occasionally punished for her cruelty, and has been emotionally, physically and verbally attacked by each member of the Griffin clan, but this has not changed her attitude.
>In "Let's Go to the Hop", Peter, while disguised as "Lando Griffin" was fooled into going to the Winter Snowball with Connie, however dumped her in front of everyone for Meg. She has done toad, but was impressed with Lando, who got her and other students to quit. In "And the Wiener is...", Connie publicly humiliated Meg at her birthday party, persuading Meg's mom Lois Griffin to send friend Glenn Quagmire over for his own fun.
>In "Barely Legal", Brian gave Connie a taste of her own medicine after she embarrassed Meg at the dance. Briefly in "Peter's Daughter", Connie confronts Meg and makes a fat joke, this endues Peter to repeatedly and brutally smash her head into a fire extinguisher, severely bruising Connie, but Connie is fully healed and back to her pretty self in future episodes. In "McStroke", Stewie tricks Connie into dating him only for her to find out he's a baby. Stewie yells out to the school that Connie made out with a baby, leaving everyone to think she's a pedophile; she is last seen getting arrested for this. In "Stew-Roids" she dates Chris briefly. Originally this is a challenge she takes on to make him popular, but she soon develops an interest in him. Later, Chris dumped her, causing her to lose her popularity for a short time. It is possible that she still likes him, although this relationship has not been mentioned since.
High quality post
They should have an episode that references all of this where her life is completely ruined
>You constantly hit on your best friend's wife
Honestly I've always felt Cleveland made the most sense given that Brian has been shown to be a racist several instances in the show and he was the most down to earth before the Clevaland Show made him black Peter Griffin
Yeah some do. Too bad 99% of homeless are in that position because they just want to do drugs while collected welfare bux from well meaning saps like you.
Sociopath detected.
Reminder this, happened
youtube.com
>he tried his best
>making Ted 2
All that says to me is that he shouldn't be making films
Now he's got a transgender dad. Haha.
>nevermind the fact Quagmire was super friendly toawrds Brian before the writers magically made him hate the dog out of nowhere and for no reason.
That's the biggest issue. Not only that but while up to this point Brian had been shown to be shallow, untalented and in love with Lois it wasn't all the core of his character. Now though being scumbag has basically become his entire character. Whenever he does something the does it like a scumbag or says some creepy thing. Just to really sell what a scumbag he is, as if that was always a trait of his. This rant didn't just change how Quagmire felt about Brian. It retroactively changed the direction they would push Brian in for the remainder of the series.
>That background blending in the last two
It looks like Lois is shocked by something else and Quagmire is right behind her about to pounce.
This, seems like whenever he talks in a new episode it’s to say something really pretentious and/or pathetic and then have Stewie or some other character call him out on it.
>Connie D'Amico becomes the punching bag of all the Griffins instead of Meg
Handjobs dont ruin a body, you're dumb Brian