You walk into your house and find this. What do you do?

You walk into your house and find this. What do you do?

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Call the cops. And an exterminator. And a cleaning service. In that order.

Call Doom Slayer, I ain't having any eldritch shit in my house.

Its fucking time

"This isnt my house, this is anal sex."

I would say: Where's the Damn Lord Dominator flash?

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Call a old priest and young priest

Pick a hole

Guys come on a happily married couple can do whatever they want with each other but not in my damn house. Not cool.

Kick the girl out, then get fucked.

promise to never ever get drunk again and search for "grill octopus desk TV set" on Amazon

Why have you been making so man Zone threads lately? He's not going to release anything, probably ever again.

Ask for her autograph and hope that if the tentacle does end up going up my pooper that Zone would at the very least be kind enough to grind on me from the front so I can claim no homo from cumming by way of being tentacle raped

close the tab...and done

Immolate my house

>he
Isn't Zone a she?

Why did Zone choose Caxx to her voice?

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Unironically this

Flash is going bye-bye.

>so I can claim no homo
Just have the tentacle fuck your pee hole.

You're gay if you don't get tentacle raped user

>Be me
>Heading to my house after a trip to the store for some snack
>Back at home now, I open my door
>Find a weird looking purple haired girl surrounded by some sort of tentacle monster
>Look he dead in the eyes
>I know what must be done
> “Hello there, are you hear for the reading of the good book”
>”Crap did we break into a religion nut’s house, god dam it dave, limp dick asshole." she says
>"It's always good to praise his glory"
>"Whatever I can always bang the god out of- ” She say till I interrupt
>”Praise the glory of Hastur”
>”Hold on what?” she says realizing what's happening
>”Praise his eternal glory, now let me read from his glorious book”
>Start reading from my copy of The King In Yellow
>”You Bitch” she say while turning in a demonic form “I’m going to gut you you cultist c^%&”
>I continue reading forcing her to demanifest
>I know her kind well, and I know that the fear of that much sanity damage will make them rather run then fight
>I walk to my couch and start eating my bag of chips
>Gotta admit she was pretty hot
>At least I got Hastur though

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god what the fuck do you think i'd do? why do people post threads like this as if there're alternative options? i walk into my house, see a a badly drawn (but nonetheless attractive) anime woman giving off 'fuck me' vibes, what do you THINK i'm going to do? i'm gonna pull my pants off, do the fuck, cum after 2 minutes of coitus and then fall asleep on the couch. stupid question.

>I'm finally gonna fuck Raven!

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I wouldn't worry. It'll be at least 5 years until she or the tentacles start moving.

kek

THIS BITCH IS AFTER MY TOILET PAPER AND CANNED RAVIOLI

>Be me
>Heading to my house after a trip to the store for some snack
>Back at home now, I open my door
>Find a weird looking purple haired girl surrounded by some sort of tentacle monster
>Look her dead in the eyes
>"rap did we- wait a minute this is the third time we've acted out this scenario"
>I realize she's completely right
>She says "we're probably trapped in a fucking time loop"
>fuckmewithabaguette.jpg
>"how are we gonna get out of this" I say
>I feel something squirming across my leg
>It's the tentacles
>I find myself bound and unable to move
>The girl's eyes turn a bright yellow and she smirks
>"'I'll just have to fuck the time loop right out of you" she says
>Next five hours has got to be one of the most Heavenly experiences I've ever had
>I'm now laying in a puddle of unknown fluids
>She stares me down and says "renounce your God and pledge yourself to me"
>I gladly do it
>She gives me the ability to see all that goes on in the world
>I'm watching (You) fap

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>thinking raven isn't gonna fuck you

ah shit, you know Carcosa?

>I hear he plain out
>"Yeah I would and all but you I'm a high ranking member in the cult of Hastur"
>"And?"
>"I just came back from an orgy like 30 minutes ago, I couldn't get it up if I tried"
>"Oh, I mean one orgy can be worked around"
>"The orgy started last saturday, I don't care how magic you are I ain't getting hard"
>"Oh"
>"Also omniscient fap fest shit ain't that impressive, like every elder god can give you that in certain ceremonies. Hastur can actually give you double that."
>"How does that-"
>"Don't know, the last guy who tried that can taste colors now, he freaks me out."
>"So..."
>"I'll just call my time loop guy, my house is super vulnerable to this shit because of some rituals I've done"
>"Okay" she looks at my snakes "Can we have some of your chips"
>"Sure, but after jim breaks the time loop can you like leave, I have a ritual in the morning and I have trouble sleep when I have guest over"
>We eat chips on the couch and catch up on Ballmastrz: 9009

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Throw the purple bitch and her weird dog outside.
I just cleaned and I don't need cum and tentacle juice all over my couch and carpet.

suck her dick

I'd ask if she'd be willing to review my penis and offer any tips on how to improve my dick's physical appearance.

Tell her to stay at least 6 feet away from me until we both wash our hands

Chad, and maybe a bit autistic

Raven can sit on my face all day if that's what she wants.

I would drop my pants, fuck her with my 2 inch cock for about 5 seconds, then pass out from exerting so much energy in one day.

Tell her to get the fuck out of my house. Anyone who wants used goods like Zone-tan is literally a desperate virgin who never fucked a woman before and would settle with a slut.

It's you that's out user, out of your mind!

Get out before that tentacle rapes me.

Might as well ask if she has a dick.

And what if she does?

HOW DARE THAT TENTACLE MONSTER CHEAT ON ME

Shrug, go "Huh, thought so" and move on.

Nah man I want a pure girl not some roastie who had a truck full of dicks ran through her.

The cum will help clean out the inside of her so that you can slide in way easier.

>Sliding your dick into other men's cum

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Think of her like a Cadbury Cream egg. Now imagine that you're going to stick your dick inside that Cadbury Cram egg. Doesn't that make everything better?

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Christ how old is she now
How old are we
where did the time fucking go

You're making it worse actually. I just want a pure girl my man.

Probably act like a wacky internet celebrity interviewee so she gets annoyed and fucks off
Still have fond memories of the Stamper interview. Shit killed me as a dumbass teen

Well if you want a pure girl then your wish is granted.

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>zone got called out in a previous thread for being greedy
>waifu mascot gets spammed across /co

Really activates the ol' almonds.

Alright I'm on board now.

Welcome to our order brother

>want children

Ew, take it back.

let's make it clear. I want this universe 6 Zone-tan not that slutbag regular Zone-tan.

10/10

Sorry no refunds