Taika Waititi's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

You're setting the bar too high and knowing Netflix it would almost certainly be a disappointment. How would they deal with the Vermicious K'nids?

>NOOOOOOOOO YOU CAN'T MAKE FUN OF MUH FUEHRER

No but the Oompa Loompas will now be unironical slave labor.

None of the other golden ticket holders will die (probably just be kicked out of the chocolate factory)

Sorry, thought you misspelt Veronica Salt

Great. Now Charlie takes it up the butt and Wonka fights the Church.

Pass.

Leave Charlie and the Chocolate Factory alone. Nothing will ever beat the original movie.

Will it be animated?

None of them die in the book either, dumbass.

>Veronica Salt
Bro, c'mon.

Yes, hence why CARTOONbrew is covering it.

Weren't they always?

Basically. Loompaland is so shit that they're way better off even acting as guinea pigs for Wonka's fucked up candy experiments, but yeah, essentially slaves getting paid in chocolate. They get a pension and retirement benefits in addition to free healthcare, but given the weird shit prototype Wonka goods do to a body, they need it.

>Blueberry scene again
Please no
This world needs to be spared of degeneracy like that

Taika will play a hoompa loompa.

But will it be GOOD animation?

People will probably complain this is perpetuating the stereotype of the immigrant or some shit.

kek

I swear this is why it keeps getting made.
The bastards who have the fetish desperately need to perpetuate it.

Could you even use oompa loompas anymore? Aren't they literally a tribe of African pygmies being used for slave labor?

There were more Nazi's who were decent people in that film than there were in any other film
How's that for progressive

Fictionally, I think it was more akin to a South American or a Polynesian group

South American most likely being the best choice as the film concerns Chocolate

But of course, hey, maybe we shouldn't get our panties in a twist concerning how a made up group of people exists

Wasn't this book basically Alien?

Do we really need another Charlie and the Chocolate factory? The story has been done enough times already.

First half yeah. Glass Elevator goes to space, finds out the world's first space hotel has been colonized by sheapeshifitng aliens, they try to kill them all before the POTUS nukes them. Second half the grandparents take deaging candy, one of them de-ages so much she is unborn and they have to go to the afterlife to age her back up. They do it so hard she ends up being 300 years old and remembers sailing over on the Mayflower.

I can’t believe it’s gotten so bad to the point where you can’t make a movie that has as vanilla a message as “Nazi bad” Without people assuming it’s anti-trump propaganda

Plus we have had lots and lots of individual tv parodies like Futurama, Family Guy, Dexter's Laboratory,

i loved how utterly fucking insane the sequel was

>that "controversy" over killing nazis Wolfenstein II
This truly is a clown world

>Do we really need X again.
Humanity has been retelling the same stories for thousands of years, modifying and repacking them to sell to a new public.
It is not that we need it, it's just what we're gonna fucking get.

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What a trip

So, which one of the kids will be black? Are any of them redheads in the book? Who am I kidding, it'll be Wonka himself. But
>Series
Is there really enough material to make into a series?

Inflation fetishists be like

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In fairness, the original movie was a poor adaptation of the book, and the second one was trying to be something similar to both the book and the original movie but failed at both. We have never gotten a good adaptation of the actual story.

Do we really need this? Is this necessary? Were people truly disappointed with either version that we need a series?

What else can honestly be added to this already? Is someone gonna be trans? Is a parent gonna be gay? What need is there to retell this story?

No, hence why Cartoonbrew is covering it.

>What else can honestly be added to this already
Most of the plot from the actual book. A ton of stuff from the factory is cut out of both movie versions.

>The Roald Dahl Cinematic Universe

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ftfy

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If by some fucking miracle this "cinematic universe" actually sticks, maybe they'll double down on how hilariously stupid it all is and officially integrate Snowpiercer into the greater canon.

While each movie adds its own sub-plot, Wilder's version with Slugworth and Depp's with Willy's father.

Wasn't there a BFG movie somewhat recently that was terrible?

Most likely never, so long as the Dahl estate continues to honor Roald's request that the sequel book never be adapted.

Remember when Taika Waititi wanted to do ANOTHER animated tale about a weird rich guy who invited children into his place?
indiewire.com/2017/02/bubbles-stop-motion-film-michael-jackson-chimp-taika-waititi-dan-harmon-1201781878/

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>Its the next hour after the end of the first movie.
>Its actually more realistic. The Loompas are just New Zealanders, the children really did have horrible accidents, but it's just a regular candy factory/development facility.
>Movie conflict happens when a government health and safety inspector comes in.
>Inspector is Rachel House.
>Lots of low key humor.
>Probably Watiki's last major Hollywood film after Love and Thunder bombs.

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He's a Peter File, Charlie!

>cinematic universe
I want this to fucking die

Best we can hope for is a green eggs and ham-like adaptation.

But when will his best book get an adaptation?

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Blame HBO and its documental.

>Muh gimme safe cock documentary
>Muh RadarOnline

Eat a Dick

What?

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Probably, but I will forever appreciate if they do take the effort to try.